Catharsis Over Heree.

When will it be enough for me to do what is necessary?
I do my homework and finish projects but yet they all are completed to the bare minimum. Will I ever go above and beyond to do things? Or will I sit here disappointed at myself and live life day to day? I keep telling myself I will focus and I'm gonna do this and that but at the end nothing's done. One day I'm ready to take on the world; the next, I'm back at square one. Where's my drive, the intensity?
I think my life needs to be refocused but I keep falling behind. Staying late at night to make up what I could've done right. Everything that I have done this year could've been better, could've been great, but it hasn't.
Everyday, I come home tired exhausted from wrestling. But why should I quit it. It brings me actualy joy in my life whenever I go there. Everytime I wrestle I get out with a smile and laugh on my face. Something inside just feels better after a good practice. So why should I give up things that bring me joy.
It really is a disappoint to see myself and reflect on this every single hour,day,week, and month. To see that I have not bettered myself when I said I would. Maybe this just isn't for me.
Originally, this post was titled "To what extent?" but now I renamed it.
I think it's much more appropriate.